Stay# One small impression

Posted: August 21, 2011 in Ramblings of a sober Poet
Tags: , , , , ,

Stay

Those smiles.
They sold me a number of
Velvet fantasies.
We stole time and
Went deep dream diving
in each others eyes.
Chocolate coated moments
Me melting all over you

I awoke in a nightmare.
Naked, tangled in the razor
Wire of her lies….

Cut by untrue truths

I think its better if you
Stay over on that side.
Just let me bleed
and heal on my own.

 ©Richard Quaz Roodt(2011)

This poem is linked to OPEN LINK NIGHT @d’Verse

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Comments
  1. Heaven says:

    This is beautiful…

    “Went deep dream diving
    in each others eyes.
    Chocolate coated moments
    Me melting all over you”

    So sad though.. it pulled my heart string ~

  2. Geraldine says:

    Oh wow, this work has a real “punch” to it. Very well done. I like the progression of your words. Sad but powerful.

  3. Your last stanza shows you can break out from the conventional shit of “She done me wrong.” That voice, in that last stanza, is unique.

  4. Pat Hatt says:

    Wow a really cool take off the photo, nicely done!

  5. brian says:

    ugh this took a sharp turn…was really enjoying myself here…

    Went deep dream diving
    in each others eyes.
    Chocolate coated moments
    Me melting all over you

    until i fell into the razor wire of lies…yikes!

  6. tashtoo says:

    Sold on the deep dream diving! Wish I had written that one! From love to pain, a roller coaster of a write, poet! And I loved the ride… Thanks for stepping to the mic! 🙂 Standing ovation and an encore request, thank you very much!

  7. ayala says:

    deep dream diving….nice..but so sad.

  8. Claudia says:

    Went deep dream diving
    in each others eyes…and then the razor hits..when we love most, we are so easy to hurt…tight write..

  9. expatinCAT says:

    Takes no prisoners. Jagged and lean…nice write. // Peter.

  10. C Rose says:

    “velvet fantasies” i adore that…your imagery is captivating in this piece. Well penned ~ Rose

  11. ms pie says:

    it is hard the distance between your side and mine… that invisible line keeping one away and another too close… dynamite!!!

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